If only we could take back the hurtful things we’ve said over the years and replace them with words of kindness and understanding. Think about it. How different would some of your relationships, even your life itself, be if you hadn’t said some of those things, hmm?

We’ve all done it. We all regret it. We all wish we could take it back. But we can’t. What we can do is try to understand why we said those hurtful things, what caused us to blurt them out in the first place, and behave differently next time. First, though, let’s state the blindingly, glimpsingly obvious:

Proverbs 15:4 A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit. (ESV)

The phrase “gentle tongue” literally refers to a healing tongue in the original Hebrew language. Imagine always approaching difficult situations with words that heal and build people up, rather than tearing them down.

But perverseness – literally, twisted or corrupt speech, lies, slander, cruelty and the like – breaks the spirit, it crushes people, wounds them, demoralises them.

Typically, we do that because we ourselves are hurting. When your heart’s aching, how capable are you of speaking lovingly to others? Not very, right?

Truth: When the heart is wounded or inflamed, the tongue often follows in destructive ways. God’s Word consistently links the condition of our heart to the words that we speak, and urges restraint, wisdom, and silence when emotions are raw

So, some gentle wisdom: don’t trust your tongue when your heart’s bitter or broken. Be silent until you heal, because a gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit

That’s God’s Word. Fresh … for you … today.